im afraid of feeling sick

everything is gross and im scared of taking supplements because im afraid ill somehow overdose even though im low on pretty much everything

my iron levels are fucked and im not eating anything healthy

now that im off of it and im on three new medications that cause weight loss as a side effect im just terrible

it never stops when i was eating more because of my medication i was afraid of obesity heart disease and diabetes

i stopped my antipsychotic and ive lost too much weight now

well not really one thing i just havent been improving

why do things seem ok then they get worse only because of one thing

im making this about myself

i cant stop picking at my fingers

but the thing is ive already had a relapse with my ocd for over a month now

last time i spiralled lowkey

last night i slept really bad and today my pop had a stroke

just because i couldnt sleep the night before my nana died

my ocd has convinced me everytime i have a really bad restless sleep someone i love could die