that’s not normal is it?

35734 - 

You totally should red, thats a good first step!

35737 - 

im not in danger but i really dont want this to devolve int something it isnt if i dont have this and my brain is just making it all up

12502 - 

Ive tried to kill myself more than 20 times theres no one who can help me i have nobody nobody cares just kill me so that the thoughts and the scrams go away please die

35736 - 

I wouldn't say thats its normal, but its not awful either

35737 - 

what sucks though is that i wanna deny it so bad but it just feels wrong

12502 - 

and i dont know what osrt of hotline/warmline i could even contact about this

12502 - 

to get some temporary help right now

12502 - 

Yeah a professional will help you determine whats best for your case red

35737 - 

or solae i guess

12502 - 

solace**

12502 - 

i just dont know how to bring it up

12502 - 

988 is good

35737 - 

too scared to call 988 i dont want to get institutionalized

12502 - 

I talk there when i feel overwhelmed

35737 - 

Call 988 when things get overwhelming

35737 - 

i dont knwo how it works im reall just a kid

12502 - 

ive been bottling it up all day and i shouldnt have

12502 - 

that sounds rough

35734 - 

You dont need to tell them everything, just use it for small talk to get things out a bit

35737 - 

116 123 is a help line if anybody feels they need someone to talk to, nice people no fees just there to listen

35027 - 

i cant do small talk

12502 - 

im not in ah eadspace wherei oculd

12502 - 

It sounds sneaky to lie but its what i do

35737 - 

lying will only make thigns worse

12502 - 

Have you tried counseling?

35737 - 

Or how about journaling to get things ou

35737 - 

I had such a horrible dream

35742 - 

ughh speaking of counseling i hate talking to school counsoulers

35734 - 

I wanna scream and cry dude i cant do this anymore it hurts so fucking bad

35736 - 

Why is that blue?

35737 - 

srry- i dont mean to brinf attention to me or sum

35734 - 

it never helps

35734 - 

No its fine blue dont worry

35737 - 

and they say the cheesiest shit ever 😭

35734 - 

No no you need help dont minumise your problems

35737 - 

im sorry my mom camein my room

12502 - 

School councillors suck never trust them

35736 - 

and i just lied to her im a hypcoriter

12502 - 

i hate how my parents constantly misinterpret my actions and think im mad at them, making a big deal of the littles things

35743 -