i want to be laughing again

since people will hurt me if im not lucky

even if im lonely

feel joy again

i want to be happy

that saved me

and dad lost the megaknight tournament

but ryouma was silly as said it was becuz of cr

i was punched in the face by dad until it bleed and i was traumatized

i cant thank ryouma enuf for helping me overcome some trauma

its relaxing?

dont become like me

how do i die

wdym by that

it feels like luck that im so disconnected

im sorry

what do you do red

i need something and i need to take care of myself

this is a waste of time

then why arent you doing more

i wish i wasnt so weak

its not a good idea

this is

i cant help but want to scream for help

somethings wrong tho

but all it takes is a few words i’ll try my best to perform otherwise

i run at work and at my house

im really desperate usually

to feel like i exist

yeah i guess i honestly just want attention

i need to be healthier to care about people more

and im pretty selfish

it takes too much time for me to learn

i used to think i was just stupid but its really a lot of limits i have

its probably learned helplessness

i dont know why i cant function better

i really do want help but i think i dont deserve it

and helpless

i feel so disconnected and lonely

like no matter how hard or what you change to try it doesnt work?