I don't know why I didn't kill myself years ago, pretty much nothing has improved and the world is fucking hell bent on getting worse.

264 - 

i know you can make it to 2 years and i think if you keep trying you could make it to 20

98390 - 

but thanks

82367 - 

that's okay red

98390 - 

nobody's perfect

98390 - 

so you said family issues did you wanna talk about that

98390 - 

today my brother blamed me for the family getting torn apart

82367 - 

divorce?

98390 - 

yes but they divorced when i was really young

82367 - 

been there red, i’m sorry, it wasn’t your fault

96882 - 

my relationship with my father is really strained

82367 - 

I don't think i would honestly give a fuck if i were about to die, put me out of my fucking misery

264 - 

how could you be to blame if you were so young? it wasn't your fault

98390 - 

i have a bad relationship with my father too it's okay that you do

98390 - 

the divorce isnt the problem. its my relationship with my dad

82367 - 

cyan you've got a lot of fight in you you can still use it

98390 - 

i don't think you should end your life here cyan

98390 - 

my relationship with both of my parents is fucked in different ways

96882 - 

i get that red i'm sorry your relationship isn't great

98390 - 

he used to be verbally abusive to me and sometimes he still lashes out in little ways

82367 - 

i'm sorry green do you want to talk about it

98390 - 

and after his outburst in january 2024 ive gone minimal contact

82367 - 

that sucks red i'm real sorry it sucks to be treated like that nobody deserves that

98390 - 

test

99725 - 

he’s never taken responsibility for his actions and pretends that he doesnt remember them happening

82367 - 

hi blue

98390 - 

hi yellow

99725 - 

so i gave up on him

82367 - 

yeah that's really tough red it's not your responsibility to keep track of his emotions and shit

98390 - 

my brother is starting to hate me for it

82367 - 

it used to affect me more, and sometimes it still hurts so much that i don’t know if i can keep living, but it’s got a bit better since i’ve given up trying to fix it

96882 - 

that's completely natural red i'm glad you had the courage to

98390 - 

what does your brother say about it

98390 - 

even my mom doesnt like that im doing this and she divorced the guy

82367 - 

i'm glad it's gotten better but that still sounds really tough green

98390 - 

i'm sorry you've got disapproval from both sides red that's really hard

98390 - 

he wants me to get along with dad and ecpects me to forgive him for no reason

82367 - 

i'm sorry if i'm doing short messages chat i'm just tryna keep track

98390 - 

expects*

82367 - 

do you think maybe he feels like the family isn't how it used to be

98390 -