i cant talk to him anymore

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i talk to him because he threatens to kill himself

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if my brother stops talking to him he'd really do it

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its my dad he shouldnt be forcing me to love him

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he shouldnt have done anything like that to me

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he hurt me in every way possible

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and it was all my fault

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nobody has any idea

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im better now

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its just hte nightmares

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and when i meet people

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who make me feel vulnerable

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im so fucking vulnerable to be honest

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its going to take years of therapy

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ive only just started therapy

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i dont know what ill do

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i cant focus on school because ive already missed so much of it

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i have adhd apparently

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i dont know how to tell if a medication is helping

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i just get all shaky and i cry at night

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i hate it

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it shouldve all made me stronger

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but he literally made me this way on purpose

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so i would crawl back to him

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i never got to be a kid

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i wish my mum hit me less as a kid

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