is anyone here

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They wont shut the fuck up about money. So I give them the money they're bitching about. Then they won't take it.

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hey

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i relapsed and it felt really good

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And, to top it off, I'm a bad person for doing it? Somehow?

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i liked seeing the blood and i almost couldn't stop myself

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i want to relapse so badly

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i just dont have my knife anymore, i dont know where it went

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my room is a mess

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How dare I give you the money you asked for. That's just crazy.

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it isn't worth the temporary happiness

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why not?

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i can never conpletely stop, i always want more pain, more blood, more hurt

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im already so fucked up physically and mentally that it doesnt make sense NOT to relapse atp

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and its really, really relaxing but its a sign im not getting better

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but i really like the pain

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i know im not getting better. i dont think, i know. i have bpd, and its lifelong. it wont ever go away

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im so sorry cyan

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the emptiness and pain and trauma will never leave me

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I don't believe I've met a bigger hypocrite. Literally any bad attribute they complain about of others, they are worse offenders. The projection is mind blowing and they see none of it.

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thats horrid, you dont deserve that

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3 therapists and 2 medications cant make me feel some positive emotion for once

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sure i feel short bursts of happiness, but my emotions swing so fast that nobody wants to be near me

66163 - 

therapy and meds are a scam for most people

66166 - 

the meds kinda helped, for a while

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but now my body's just used to them

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and they dont really do shit

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have you talked to your doctor about it?

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:P

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:3

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XC

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ah

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AISHITE AISHITE AISHITE MOTTO MOTTO

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si, i have

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okay, what did your doctor say?

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they just said "well if its helping a little, its better than not at all"

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and told me to stay on the meds

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okay

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awh im sorry, that sucks :(

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i wish i could help you

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