you've a gifted brain and what not

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yet you keep on finding a formula

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i dont know its hard to ignore

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yes

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a fucking formula

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But now that i dont talk with my groomer i thought life would be easier but its not its like anytime someone touches me i get anxious and think back to all the times he told me graphic ways he touchme

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I feel like im doing something wrong always

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that you use and everything is set in the equation

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So why not do right

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Just go back to the usual path

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you. just. need. to. straight. up. study

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Why dont i want to

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Why am i so selfish

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and yet here you are

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And now my tiny little fear of men i have has gotten worse and now specifically all men older than me scare me

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Why does it matter so much

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like you are an enlightened person who doesn't want to be a part of the revenue algorithm of yt

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Why am i so scared to face my problems

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yet you are so desperate to fap. second time

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Because itll all cement the fact ive donewrong? Bullshit

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where is your simmering anger

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the plot of revenge

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you're gonna take those evil doers down right ?

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where's you resolve

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neither you have guilt nor remorse of destroying yourself

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ughhhhh whats a break gonna do. Whats the privilege

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What the fuck do i do.

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nor fear of being trampled

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I cant Do nothing

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I need to Do something

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But i can only feel alive by doing nothing

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I hate the way iam right now i dont think my grooming situation was bad enough fof people to actually worry but i think it affected me more than i realized and i need help

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For some reason

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nor the guts to just do it rather than think of finding a solution

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I hate myself least when im doing nothing

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nothing comes free

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Because its all wrong, so much wrongs

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love comes at one's ego's expense

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So much bad. Bad girl

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No good. Nothings good

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