oh I finally managed to get on here - lil

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I grew up not really being jealous of my sibling, but noticed the vast difference between how they treat me and my younger sibling.

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I’ve just gone through something really really traumatic - lil

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Oh my what happened lil?-kuro

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or someone I’m dealing with has. and it’s been traumatic for me too - lil

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so I still live with my parents as they both

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have chronic health problems and disabilities. my dad attempted suicide this weekend - lil

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brb

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Oh my.. my apologies lil that must of been traumatic..-kuro

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we had to report him missing, he had been going out for long walks all week and it was weird to us because he’s so physically ill and normally doesn’t do that - lil

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He's lost. His mind has wandered off to somewhere dark.

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on the weekend while he was out for a walk he texted saying he’s not coming back home because he’s suicidal - lil

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we had to get the cops to search for him and they found him on the complete other side of town and took him to hospital - lil

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we now finding out he was suicidal because he got scammed big time and possibly even robbed while he was going out as part of some online scam or something - lil

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My hair is thinning.

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Ooh

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he still won’t tell us the whole story because he’s so rattled but he was desperate to wash his feet when he came home because he mentioned something about being forced to drag through mud somewhere

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I've become hideous.

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I might get alopecia.

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I'm scared. I don't want to get alopecia.

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why the fuck is this my life why the fuck is this our lives - lil

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they took all his money whoever hurt him - lil

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I thought life was fun and kind to anyone.

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he came home with blood and bruise marks - lil

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My eyelashes are falling.

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and now we have to watch him take his meds and keep his medication cabinet safe because he’s suicidal again

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My brow is slowly falling.

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My hair is thinning.

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My body is weak.

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I'm scared.

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I wish someone would just pull me out of this hell hole.

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I’m so fucking scared

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I don't want to be ugly.

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My head hurts from crying.

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every single time I get close to being even slightly happy or getting my life together something fucked up and traumatic like this happens - lil

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But I still have to continue on living.

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hiii im back

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I don't want to die.

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I don't want this life anymore.

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I already have complex PTSD from huge huge piles of fucked up traumatic shit as well as my dad trying to drive a car off a cliff to attempt suicide while I was in my teens and homeless

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